Yearning

When is the right time to let go of secrets?
I have been vocal throughout my recovery about who abused me.
But I have also omitted one particular name.

It's a significant name.
Why protect someone who ...
Hurt?
Used?
Coerced?
Tossed me away like used trash?
Hated me for his actions?
I could go on forever.

Today, someone important to me asked pointedly who the others were?
I don't know what to say.
People will be hurt.
But why is it still my job to protect?

What lie within myself am I perpetuating with this secret?
Is this one of the reasons that I am stuck?
Unable to let go of the past and move on?

In huddling over this nasty secret I think I am betraying myself.
I yearn to believe that I am worthy of a healthier life than that.